Behind the Masks
by BlazeWinger
Summary: (MMPR-PRN) "Some say we're superhuman, others say we're aliens, some say we're gods sent to live amongst humans, some say we're mythical warriors. But they are wrong. Behind the multicolored helmets and masks, we're people too. We smile, we cry, we live, we die." My take on stories of each Ranger and their lives during, before and/or after their time as Rangers. Series of one-shots


**The 'Eccentric' Bomb Specialist**

 **Gemma Fei Lu, The RPM Ranger Operator Series Silver**

* * *

 **Rating:** **K+**

 _ **A/N: A series of one shots that revolve around each Ranger in the franchise, this series takes a look at each Rangers' life and how their pasts paved who they are today. Bare with me that they have been altered a bit in terms of age, universe and their behaviour. It can be taken as AU or OOC**_ – **the timeline and settings... not the actual characters. _The Rangers picked are at random so I do not know who I will write about next until the time comes. And what time that is... I am not sure. I guess I just wrote this to see how far I can go just to get the creative juices flowing for my current series._**

 _ **Also, the average rating is T but there will be chapters rated K. I have doubts that I will venture into M rating category but if I do, I will bump up the rating.**_

 _ **The first one I got was Gemma so this is my take on Gemma's life and struggles.**_ _**Gemma is a very complex character so writing her portrayal is a challenge. She**_ _ **is an intellectual as well as a childish, bubbly person. With the wrong outlook on her, she can come across as OOC by being too annoying or being too intelectual. I tried paying attention to close detail. Here's to hoping I did her character justice.**_

* * *

 **Somewhere outside Corinth**  
 **Central America**  
 **2017**  
 **Alternate Earth**

"Boom! The building goes down!" Gemma Fei-Lu yelled out in ecstacy as another building exploded and went down but the excitement of the statement felt forced... maybe because she was not with the person who would get excited about it when it happened. Gemma works for the army now as a scientist and flyer in the Eagle Squad, locating ex Venjix facilities around the world and blowing them up.

Blowing them up was her favourite part.

"Dr. Fei-Lu," Gemma turned to see Corporal Hicks before her as soon as she landed and got off the plane, offering her a stern salute that she offered back with enthusiasm. As a military scientist, she really didn't fall beneath the ranks but she still found it fun.

"Colonel Truman has relieved you of your duties today, ma'am." He said in a monotone voice and Gemma giggled.

"Silly Hicks! I'm your friend... you don't have to talk to me in that..." She paused as she puffed up her cheeks, put on a stern look and a straight lined mouth. " _I have a stick up my butt_ look." She laughed afterwards, clearly amused by her own joke but Hicks just stared at her. Gemma internally sighed, really missing her twin at that moment. Sure she made some awesome friends and all but no one could get her in the way Gem did. She made her way back to camp and noticed Vasquez running up to her.

"Dr. Fei-Lu, there is a call for you." Gemma nodded at Vasquez before following her into the REC room.

"Is it Lieutenant Truman with _another_ boring mission for me?" Gemma groaned exaggeratedly in annoyance. She loved Scott wholeheartedly as a good friend but any time her former fellow RPM ranger would call, it was always a doom and glum search and destroy mission _without_ the destroying.

Vasquez looked around to see if anyone was looking. "Actually, I pulled some strings and got you a thirty minute window to talk to Flynn." Gemma perked up instantly. "I know the Colonel doesn't like you getting distracted during these missions but..."

Gemma didn't let her finish before jumping on her, tackling her to the floor and saying "Thank you, thank you, thank you, thank you, I love you, I love you, I love you, I love you, mmmmmwah!" She finished off by kissing her forehead and getting off of her. "Oh my god! Is my hair okay? Am I covered in dust?"

"As if he'd care... it's just a video call." Vasquez got up and dusted herself off. "Be careful not to get caught. I am not going down with you."

"Thank you!" She squealed before running into the REC room and seeing the computer screen on and a video chat request on the screen. She eagerly turned it on and was happy to be met by a sweet head of light brown hair, big brown eyes and a boyish smile.

"Hello there, lass." He smiled at her after greeting her in his warm Scottish accent that Gemma loved and missed so much.

"Just keep talking..." Gemma grinned goofily, propping her elbow on the table and leaning her cheek on her fisted hand.

"And why is that?" Flynn asked slightly confused with a short chuckle.

"I just like hearing you talk." Gemma shrugged.

Flynn laughed. "I'd rather hear about your life right now. While you're travelling the world in search of the Venjix Empire remains, I'm here fixing cars and computers."

"As expected of my simple mechanic." Gemma cooed earning an annoyed look from Flynn and Gemma giggled. "I love you!" She said before making a kissy face at him.

"Sure you do..." Flynn rolled his eyes. "And in case you're wondering; I am also working on some weaponry for the military."

"Of course! Oh! Where's Ethan?" Gemma asked.

"Sleeping." Flynn said in a chipped tone. "I just put him down, please don't make me wake him up."

Gemma laughed. "Give him a big kiss for me and tell him mommy will be home soon."

Flynn pouted. "You don't give me big kisses anymore..."

Gemma smirked. "If I may recall Ranger Blue, I gave you a very big kiss before I left and it wasn't just on your mouth."

The ex RPM Blue Ranger reddened in embarrassment before clearing his throat. "So when will you be back?"

"In two days," Gemma smiled. "I got some new crayons and construction paper."

Flynn smiled. "Ethan will really like that, love."

Gemma gave him a look. "Heck no, he can have my old ones. Those are mine!"

Flynn looked rather frustrated. "You know what? Don't come home."

"Why?" The ex Silver Ranger pouted.

"I cannot take care of two babies at once." Flynn said.

Gemma grinned. "You love me!" Flynn rolled his eyes. "Ethan is your child... _I_ am your baby."

Flynn laughed. "I can't deal with you." He shook his head as he laughed. "But still... two _children_ in the house is too much to deal with for a single parent like me."

"Hey, then what am I?" Gemma pouted.

"You're the kid parent." Flynn said.

"At least there aren't three children in the house." Gemma grinned.

"Um... come again?" Flynn asked.

"Me, Ethan and Gem, silly." Gemma grinned but felt her smile begin to crack as a tear fell down her cheek. She sniffled and swiped at it. "It's dusty out here." Gemma sniffled as she rubbed her eye.

"Gemma, it's okay." Flynn coaxed.

"I'm sorry." Gemma let out a little sob before sniffling. "I just... I know that we have our lives together and a great kid but... it was always Gem and Gemma and I really miss him. Have the..."

"I'm expecting a call today. It's okay to miss him." Flynn comforted her. "He was your twin. That's not something you can... forget in the blink of an eye."

Gemma grinned as her brain started to reminisce. "Yeah... it's not..."

* * *

 _I didn't remember much about my childhood... only that there was a tall guy who always followed me in my wake. Gem always insisted that he was the leader because he always insisted that he was the oldest, I always let him have his fun._

 _My first day in alphabet was strange meeting Doctor K and all. We were recruited due to our keen intellect and wide knowledge in engineering, maths, physics, chemistry and human biology but Dr. K – who was thirteen years old... four years younger than me – was incredibly smarter. It is safe to say she was less than pleased with Gem and I. We were so close that we could never tell when we were doing 'that thing'... the one where we finish each others' sentences. We understood each other that well so it was never a bother to me that we would interupt each other just to finish each other's thoughts._

 _It was easier when we were younger and – rationally – genderless._

 _Gem never really understood that females were high maintainance and self conscious compared to boys. Human nature was a very cruel thing; making females more conscious of themselves simply because they had more reproductive organs than males and there was always something going on with them. So at some point – or many points – our close knit relationship became somewhat strained._

 _"Gemma! You're taking too long in the shower!" Gem once said as he knocked on the bathroom door as I showered on one of our first weeks in Alphabet soup. Dr. K had woken up, showered and left to work a long time ago. I decided to take the time to clean up. My periods started in the middle of the night and I spotted on the bed so I took all my linens and soiled pyjamas to wash before showering._

 _"Hold your horses, I'm–"_

 _"Almost done." Gem interrupted. "But I need to shower too. You've been–"_

 _"In there for ages." I completed. "I know. Be patient."_

 _I heard a huff then three minutes later as I was patting myself dry with a towel, I heard the door open. Squealing, I kicked the door close out of reflex and I heard a bang, an 'ow!' before a plummet. "What the heck, Gem!" I know we are twin siblings and really close ones at that but what the actual heck! We're not that close! I'm not even sure if we were the types that would take baths together when we were kids._

 _"My nose is bleeding, no thanks to you!" Gem groaned._

 _"Poopy face!" I screamed as I continued in a hurried pace._

 _"You just said the p word!" He childishly gasped._

 _I groaned in annoyance as I frantically continued to get dressed. I am a very forgiving person so I completely put the bathroom ordeal behind me and continued the day all happy-go-lucky even though most teenage girls would be angry. Technically speaking, I am angry but I can't be angry forever. This whole new world was scary for both of us. My brother clinging on to me was a coping mechanism. That's how he was. And I cannot fault him for it._

 _But sometimes I wish I was just Gemma... not a part of the Gem and Gemma show._

 _"Gemma..." I heard Dr. K's meek voice call out to me as Gem and I spared in the empty white room where we were normally handed projects by those two annoying Alphabet Soup agents. I know Gem and I are ecstatic and happy all the time but their fake smiles made me want to punch them both in the teeth. Unlike Gem and Dr. K who tolerated them... I had an irrational hatred towards them, always calling them out or lashing out. It was purely instinctively._

 _Anyways, I was confused for a second as to why she only called my name instead of both of us. Thinking that she was going to complain about how me and Gem's sparring session will get in the way of fixing her ranger prototype hardware, I turned ready with a wide grin and an apology until I paused at the sight of her white lab coat that was blood red in... that area._

 _"Oh my God! K, are you o–" I cut Gem off by running in her direction, taking off my training jacket and wrapping it round her butt where the spot was worse before grabbing her by the hand. "Gemma, where are you–"_

 _"You saw nothing!" I threatened him with a glare before pulling her away and whisking her off to the sleeping quarters where all three of us slept before closing the door. "K, you should be more careful!"_

 _"But I don't see anything wrong with Gem..."_

 _"He's a male." I emphasized. "It is not very appropriate for him to see you like this."_

 _"But we are all human." K shrugged. "We're just anatomically inequivalent."_

 _I did not blame her for thinking this way. She was practically a child who hardly understood the whole concept of womanhood... even I understood none of it. I'm just going by intuition. They may have erased my memories but knowledge obtained from my previous life still remained. "If we are all human, then would you mind being... in your birthday suit in front of Gem?"_

 _K began to turn red and guffaw at me in embarrassment. "What? Of course not!"_

 _"Why?" I asked her and for once in all my existence of knowing her, she kept quiet. She had no rational explanation for her answer. I smiled politely at her. "Things to do with especially the female anatomy is not something you can easily explain."_

 _K looked distressed. "So... what do I do?"_

 _For a second, I could not see the intelligent, sharp tongued inventor but a lost fourteen year old girl. She has been cooped up in this place ever since she was a child unlike Gem and I who were dragged here recently. She's oblivious to the ways of the world outside. I had an iota of an idea so I should help her._

 _"I can aid that." I smiled as I walked over to my trunk at the foot of my bed. "You can sit... you look uncomfortable."_

 _"I will bleed onto your jacket." K looked surprised at my kindness._

 _"I'll wash it out." I said as I pulled out a pack of disposable pads and tampons. At least that Alphabet soup lady recruiter thing was understanding enough to buy disposable ones after I asked... Or demanded if I put it in betters terminology. Her showing me how to use a towelling pad was not fun and using it was less fun. It felt like using a diaper._

 _"Can I ask you a question?"_

 _"Go for it." I answered her._

 _"Why is my onset so late?" K asked and I was kind of surprised at the question. It was an anatomy question so I thought she would know._

 _"I'd consider it rather normal but things like nutrition and physical maturity cause it... like when your body decides to start producing oestrogen in your pituitary glands." I answered._

 _"Okay... what are those?" K asked and I laughed at her question._

 _"These are stuff used to soak up the blood." I held up the tampons' box. "These are tampons. I find them more effective over regular pads because they suck up all the blood before it even sees the light of day outside your body."_

 _"How come?" K asked, doe eyed._

 _I giggled as I pulled it out and she marvelled at the shape. "You insert it inside... you know..." K looked distressed. "It is uncomfortable so not even I recommend it unless you engage in rigourous, athletic activity. You can use regular pads. I'll show you how to patch it on your underwear because even if you miss by a centimetre, you will spot. Hand me a clean underwear of yours."_

 _"... Why are you being so nice to me?" K asked after hesitantly getting me a clean underwear._

 _"Hmm?" I questioned._

 _"I've been mean to you and Gem since you got here." She sighed. I looked at her in deep thought before switching beds and sitting next to her._

 _"We understand that you have been alone for a long time." I grinned at her. "So it is normal for you to feel uncomfortable. We'll wait as long as you like until you feel free." K looked up at me and I saw a tear threatening to fall from her eye. "K... are you...crying?"_

 _"N-no." She sniffled, swiping at her eye but the tears kept coming until she was full on sobbing. K in a way was like Gem but in a totally different spectrum. Both needed companionship – Gem would cling on to the closest person to make sure he isn't alone. K didn't have that luxury. She had to build a strong, tough façade just to keep people out and prevent herself from looking like she was hurting even though she needed someone to share the pain with. I pulled her into a hug and comforted her. She was only a child. She needed guidance and I and Gem, as well with his sappy heart, were glad to be those people. Soon enough, Dr. K opened up to us and looked up to us, trusted us._

 _She was also the first person to see Gem as just Gem and me as just Gemma._

* * *

 _After the Venjix virus had been released into the world, Gem and I had taken the Series Silver and Series Gold Ranger prototypes and launched guerilla attacks in the wastelands. Considering the fact that the air there was toxic and food and water sources were limited, Gem and I were lucky to have survived and done substantial damage to the Venjix empire. But it was even harder to survive after we were captured by Venjix bots._

 _When the others introduced us to Dr. K, they were shocked at how sweet she was towards us. I can bet my awesome diary that she gave them hell. We even convinced her to try and be nicer to them. As funny as that awkward moment was with the way she complimented the others – should've gotten it on camera – Gem and I knew it was a step in the right direction._

 _"What do you think of the Rangers?" Dr. K asked me as she assessed my Ranger hardware and had my lungs checked out. After three years of not having it serviced properly, it was nice to be brought back to full power. I could not wait to blow stuff up properly. PEEEEEEWWWWWW!_

 _I get too excited for this stuff._

 _"They're... quite the characters." I honestly said. It had only been a few hours. I can't say much about them. "Although they are quite... stuck up."_

 _"Stuck up?" Dr. K echoed._

 _"Yeah!" I smiled before taking off my helmet. "They can't be loose or fun. They're all so down and stuck up."_

 _"Understand, they were affected deeply by Venjix's appearance." Dr. K said._

 _"I guess..." I shrugged although a part of me was skeptical. I honestly felt like no one had honestly suffered the way Dr. K, Gem and I had... maybe Dillon when I delve into his story but a loss is a loss. "Did anything come up on our x-Ray scans? Infections, inflammations, tumor... Gem and I have been in the wastelands for so long that I'm kind of worried about our lung conditions as well as the brain due to radiation."_

 _Dr. K shook her head. "The two of you are fine." I nodded and smiled out of relief. "I was worried about you two."_

 _I smiled at her. "You ain't getting rid of us that easily, K." As absurd as the joke was, she smiled in humor before carrying on with the diagnostics of my morpher and gear._

 _"Do you have any crayons and construction paper... ooh! And twine too!"_

 _Dr. K narrowed her eyes at me. "Uhh... no." She said in a flat voice._

 _"Gem and I need to make new diaries." I shrugged. "We left our old ones at the facto–" I paused at that word before I shook it off with a grin I and demorphed before skipping out of the room to find Gem, leaving Dr. K to call after me. I understood her concern but even if there was nothing out of place physically, mentally we would never be the same again... and apparently internally but that's a different story._

 _On to my new teammates, from what I could gather, they were just a group of individuals who fought for a common goal. I didn't mind that Gem and I were weird in their eyes. We're weird even in my eyes but I would not change it for the world. As weeks went by, I had already come to a coherent thought on each member of the team. Team leader Scott was exactly how a team leader should be; strong, smart, tactical... but annoyingly stubborn and chauvanistic at times – I won't lie though, it seems like a trend with most males on the team. Dillon on the other hand is probably a bigger cinammon roll than Gem despite the whole male bravada and the tough, brooding exterior. I also think it is kinda cute that Summer was the only one who could really see that side to him when he was extremely vulnerable._

 _Summer's a sweetheart and a baddie all wrapped into one. The way she keeps the guys in line amazes me. She's awesome that way. Ziggy is... not someone I would call a candidate to be an RPM Ranger but I will not lie, he is a hard worker no matter how many people can deny it. He tries to keep on par with us and it is admirable no matter how goofy he is. And hey, he is funny... sadly sometimes, it just does not work._

 _And Flynn... let's just say I haven't gathered enough intel about him other than the fact that he is Scottish and a mechanic. He is just so... silent; only giving input when he has to. I can see that he was probably raised well because he has excellent manners, is gentle and he treats people in a respectable way but from there I have nothing about him. From two weeks alone, I could tell what makes each Ranger tick except for him. He was just so... simple._

 _That is exactly what makes him tick._

 _Not being regarded as 'simple' but rather not being taken seriously to begin with. In a nutshell, that defines his mannerisms completely. He does not speak unless he has to only because he fears that people will disregard his opinions. He hides all the amazing ideas he has just because the pros – coughcoughDocKcoughcough – will belittle him. Trust me, I know how hard it is to gain that little girl's respect especially on an intellectual level._

 _But when I saw his invention, it was absolute genius. Of course it would have kinks to it; he is a mechanical engineer... not a robotics engineer. The design, engines and wiring were great... I guess it was programming where the thing fell flat. Nevertheless it was still an ingenious invention. I am mad at him for reading my diary and I intend to blow his butt all the way to Timbuktu with one of Gem and I's special explosives but some other time._

 _That time we spent together after that over the next few weeks, just the two of us with no other person around, sparked a mutual trust and understanding between the two of us. So much so that I found myself often levitating towards him and spending more time with him; more than Dr. K and even more than Gem at times much to his dismay. I had no idea what it meant... becoming so close knit with a complete stranger in a matter of weeks._

 _"Do you by any chance like Flynn?" Summer had asked me one day. We were not as close like I was to Gem or Flynn or even our good doctor friend but she liked to pull me away from the testosterone filled male energy in the team that she often called barbaric. I think she enjoyed having another female on the team even if it was just me. Summer was like a big sister to me. I could tell her a lot of things and not be judged and she helps me a lot by giving me advice and taking good care of me._

 _"Yeah, he is a great friend." I grinned._

 _"No, I mean do you like-like him?" She asked and I was kind of lost. "Do you like him more than you like detonator putty?" She rephrased herself with a huff._

 _I gasped in outrage and exaggeration. "That is blasphemous!"_

 _Summer gave me a look that told me she was utterly stupefied before rubbing her temples and taking a breath. "Okay... what I meant is, do you like Flynn as more than just a friend?"_

 _Being that I was gullible at the time, I cocked my head to the side confusedly. "Not sure I'm following."_

 _"As in... you see the way Ziggy looks at Dr. K?" She asked._

 _"The lost-puppy-desperately-looking-for-attention look?" I countered._

 _"Yeah... worst example." Summer sighed. "Kay, well you see that there is normally a difference in how you like people. There are people you like and there are people you like more than others. These people are just more special than the others."_

 _"Explain..."_

 _"Okay... would you rather go over plans with Scott, have Dillon teach you how to drive, spend an entire afternoon listening to Ziggy's jokes, keep Flynn company while he fixes our car engines or go blow something up with Gem?" She asked. "You can only pick one."_

 _"Okay... I'd go for Flynn obviously." I shrugged as if it was a no brainer._

 _"Why?"_

 _"Well... planning with Scott is boring, Ziggy can be a bit... displeasing if you spend way too much time with him, Dillon is a big fat meanie and I spend time with Gem all the time." I said._

 _"This has nothing to do with you liking Flynn more than you like the others?" Summer asked._

 _"Well... I do like Flynn but that's because he's a good friend." I smiled._

 _"How much do you like him?" She followed up._

 _"Well... how can you exactly measure that?"_

 _She smirked deviously. "Flynn!" She called out and my eyes widened in confusion. "Can we play?"_

 _He looked at Scott whom he was playing with who shrugged, just as confused as he was. "Sure." He shrugged._

 _"But I thought..."_

 _"Don't question it, we are experimenting." She said as she jumped up to her feet and pulled me with her._

 _"But I don't know how to play pool." I said. Gem was the one eager to learn when we first got here. I always thought it was a bit boring. I liked games where people jump around and move their bodies... big people games were boring._

 _"That's the point." She said as she pulled me along with her. Once we reached the table, she let go of my hand and took Scott's pool stick. "Gemma, aren't you gonna take a pool stick?"_

 _"But Gemma can't play." Scott said._

 _"Yeah... I should probably..."_

 _"We can teach you. Right Flynn?" Summer asked the Scot._

 _"Um... if she'd be okay with that." Flynn nodded unsurely._

 _"Well, if this is anything like teaching Gem then I'll be over there." Scott said before going off to the other end of the garage. Summer rolled her eyes before setting up the balls then the pool cue ball._

 _"So the objective of the game is to get all the balls you are assigned to into the holes on the side of the table." Summer said. "You have two kinds of balls; solids and patches."_

 _"Solids are the one with a solid colour?" I asked._

 _"Correct. So you start by breaking with the white ball. Wanna give it a go?" Summer offered._

 _"I... okay?" I shrugged before going over to where Summer stood. Waving the stick clumsily, almost hitting Summer in the face, she ducked and giggled._

 _"Easy there!" Summer laughed. "Put the stick flat on the table, hold it firmly and aim for the cue ball. Make sure the stick can move." I tried following her advice but I either always lost balance or scratched the pool stick tip against the green pool flooring._

 _"This isn't working!" I whined like a child, stomping my foot against the ground. What's another reason not to like this stupid adult game besides the fact that it is boring and I suck at it?_

 _"Gemma, you don't need to complicate this." Flynn chuckled at me as he walked over. "Okay, follow my lead." He gently took my arm and immediately, a tingling sensation shot my arm and I almost jerked my hand from his. I wasn't wearing my track suit jacket so it was even worse. What was that? "Now lay the pool stick onto the table, leave about a thirty centimeter gap between the table edge and the end of this pool stick." He told me in a soft tone that I had never heard before and I almost squeaked at how it sounded. Why was I feeling this way? I sucked a breath as he stood behind me and showed me where to put the pool stick and firmly guided my hand on where to grip it with his. His fingers were callous and rough against mine and the sensations became worse this time with my heart beating uncontrollably. My body felt hotter. My face felt like it was on fire._

 _Did the air conditioning just die on us?_

 _"We leave this gap to allow for the pool stick to move," He demonstrated so by moving his hand which was still on top of mine. He was close... Too close... For a person who liked to invade other people's personal spaces, I wasn't enjoying this... I think. He kept talking but I couldn't hear a word he was saying. He was too close. His torso was pressed to my back, I could smell the motor oil on him and something else that smelled sweet and nice. Did I mention he was touching me too? It wasn't like he has never touched me before. We have fought together against Tenaya in a rather... hands on manner but I guess I was too focused on the fighting._

 _"... Now bend over."_

 _"What?" I questioned and Summer burst laughing while Flynn immediately flinched and backed away from me like I was on fire. I turned to him and he was flustered, as red as a tomato._

 _"I-I didn't mean it like that!" He immediately said, waving his hands erratically and Summer was gone; onto her knees, clutching at her stomach and laughing her lungs out. Even though I was still flustered from the close contact, I was confused by what he meant. I simply zoned out and wanted him to repeat what he had been saying before. Why was he so embarrassed?_

 _"What do you mean?" I asked him looking at him but I avoided eye contact as he looked back at me, twiddling with my thumbs._

 _"Uh nothing..." Flynn chuckled nervously. "I have to go and... do laundry. I totally forgot." He scratched at his head before speed walking out of the room._

 _"What just happened?" I asked Summer who was finally calm after all that laughing._

 _"My experiment was more successful than I ever imagined." She stood up, taking the pool sticksband placing them back where they were kept._

 _"How?" I questioned, remembering what had sparked this whole awkward situation... measuring how much I liked a person._

 _"Did you like the way he touched you... Or how his voice sounded in your ear?" I blushed when she said this and smirked before giggling. " **Now bend over**... I can now confidently say I have heard everything." She laughed._

 _"What does it mean?" I asked, still utterly clueless._

 _"I'll tell you when you are older." She smiled at me and I pouted. "I'm sorry sweetie. Let's go get you some ice cream." I instantly perked up and she was forgiven._

 _Safe to say that Flynn avoided me for three days after the incident. I couldn't blame him because I was still embarrassed too. Any time our eyes met, we would both turn red and look away. Summer's theory that I like-like him echoed in my mind. Maybe I did? I don't know. But if I don't like him as a friend... does that mean I like him as a boyfriend? I don't even know a thing about that. The closest thing I have seen to that is Summer and Dillon and it looked... creepy. I once saw him bite her ear and she giggled. Wasn't that painful? Plus I've seen Dillon sneak into Summer's room some nights when I was working late. Does it mean they have intercourse... Is that what having a boyfriend entails... Do I want to have intercourse with Flynn?_

 _These questions horrified and haunted me all at once._

* * *

 _I remember waking up in the middle of the night, plagued with these thoughts and finding him downstairs, working on the truck's engine and Dillon's bonnet cap. I wanted to run, get a cup of milk and run back up but I could talk to him. I missed making Venjix fighting weapon upgrades with him and when we were working on one earlier today, he seemed very distant. I settled for the former and made a quick and quiet bee line for the kitchen but in the dim light that only shone over his truck, I ended up kicking the island and let out a distressed squeal, hopping about on one foot and he stopped his work momentarily and looked up, cranning his head to look past the car that was obscuring his vision. "Gemma?" He spotted me in the dim light._

 _"Hi..." I waved awkwardly at him._

 _"What are you doing?" He asked._

 _"Sparring with the furniture... and losing." I joked to ease the tension and it worked as he chuckled a bit. I was glad at my success and I smiled. Things didn't have to be weird between Flynn and I. I love our friendship and I'd hate for it to be strained all because something weird happened. "Hard day's night?" I mocked._

 _"You have no idea." Flynn said as soon as he spotted me. "Why are you up so late, lass?"_

 _"Couldn't sleep so I decided to get a glass of milk." I said. "Need any help?"_

 _"Yeah... could you hand me the spanner?" Flynn asked._

 _I walked over to his tool box and picked up the spanner before skipping over to him. "Here you go!" I said._

 _"Thanks." Flynn smiled at her before taking the tool and turning back to the engine. I decided to go off to the kitchen to get that cold glass of milk but instead of downing it and going back to bed, I decided to go back to Flynn and watch him work. Half an hour later, Flynn closed the bonnet and dusted off his hands. "You haven't gone back to sleep?"_

 _"Can't sleep anyway." I shrugged before sipping my milk._

 _"You are a strange one, lass." Flynn shook his head._

 _"Insomnia is now considered as strange?" I questioned him._

 _"No... I meant..." He trailed off. "Forget it."_

 _"No, say it." I insisted._

 _"It's stupid." He countered._

 _"I doubt." I said._

 _Flynn scratched at his head forgetting there was motor oil on his hand, smearing his light brown hair. "I just find it strange how you just stood there and watched me work **quietly** for half an hour."_

 _"Are you saying that I am incapable of being quiet?" I questioned him._

 _"You asked for it." He shrugged._

 _"I'll have you know that I am more than just a human siren." I said._

 _"I can tell." He laughed. "I think we should be off to bed." He said before heading for the staircase. I followed behind him but stopped and settled on the couch. I heard his footsteps stop and he looked back at me. "Aren't you coming, Gemma?"_

 _"I told you, I can't sleep." I said, putting the now empty glass of the table. As I propped my legs up on the couch, I leaned my head back and rested it on the couch, closing my eyes. Thinking that Flynn already left, I did not expect to have my legs gingerly nudged off from where they were propped up before he settled on the couch next to me. "I thought you were tired."_

 _"I said that I think we should go to bed." Flynn said. "I never said I was tired."_

 _I giggled. "If you sleep on the job tomorrow, Dr. K will have your head."_

 _"I slept enough today. I don't think anymore can catch me... at least not now." He retorted. "Besides, it's been a while since we talked and now seems like a good time."_

 _"Aww! You missed me! Did you wanna spend time with me?" I cooed at him, grabbing a hold of his chubby cheeks and squeezing them. "You are such a sweetheart."_

 _"Get your hands off, lass." He swatted my hands away as an embarrassed, rosy colour stained his cheeks and I giggled._

 _"At least you were raised well," I smirked. "Only a gentleman would sit here with a girl they found incredibly annoying."_

 _"You hold such a high opinion of me it is kind of laughable." He said. "And who said I thought that of you? Gemma, you aren't annoying, just... excessively enthused."_

 _"I'm not annoying?" I gasped before grinning and throwing my hands in the air. "Hooray! Hooray! Hoo–"_

 _"Shh!" Flynn said before putting his hand over my mouth and my heart began to race. It was the poll conundrum all over again. "What is wrong with you, man? You're gonna wake up the whole house."_

 _"My world is in technicolor. What's your excuse for being all doom and glum?" I asked after prying his hand from my mouth, thankful that it was a bit dark for him to see my reddened cheeks._

 _"If you haven't noticed, a post apocalyptic world we live in kind of entails doom and glum being the order of the day." He said._

 _I frowned. "It doesn't have to be that way... especially when we're winning."_

 _Flynn scoffed. "What exactly are we winning, lass? The world is gone... there's nothing left to win."_

 _"We get to win our world back and start on a clean slate." I said. "We get the liberty to live freely again and even though the world is gone, we can rebuild it again. Don't forget why we fight."_

 _"I haven't, Gemma. Trust me, I know." He sighed, pinching the bridge of his nose._

 _"Good! Because I did not spend three years blowing stuff up in the wastelands just for you to give up on me." I poked him in the chest and he gave me a humor filled smile._

 _"You enjoyed it, don't even pretend that it was only out of duty." I grinned widely at his statement, confirming it at once. "I still think it is an incredible accomplishment really."_

 _"What is?"_

 _"You and Gem blowing up parts of the Venjix empire on your own... in a really dangerous region of the world." He emphasized._

 _"Pfft! Everywhere is dangerous." I scoffed, waving my hand dismissively at the statement._

 _"Exactly... you and Gem could have died one way or the other." He smiled. "You two are forces to be reckoned with, lass."_

 _I tried to keep up my wide grin but it slowly began to crumble as I remembered my times in the wasteland. "I thought I was going to die on more than one occassion." I frowned as I shuddered at the memory. "It was our faults that Venjix got out; me, Gem and K so it was only fair that we fought it out there where it was the worst. But it was more than just blowing stuff up. We couldn't wear anything but our Ranger suits because the air was too toxic. Finding food, water... I'm surprised I even survived. Gem was more sturdy then I ever was. I was always so... so close to crumbling."_

 _"Gemma..."_

 _"I'm fine, Flynn." I let go of the mournful disposition and smiled. "Anything was better than the facto–" I shook my head, trying to shake the thoughts away. "I'm just glad to be alive. That's why I am always so hyper and crazy – I don't want to regret anything in my life."_

 _"I see..." Flynn huffed. "Gemma... you don't have to be strong all the time."_

 _"I need to be strong." I insisted._

 _"But you can't be with all this pent up sadness and trauma." He shot back. "You can't blow up stuff thinking that your past will float away."_

 _"We did blow up that factory, Flynn!" I argued. "What do you say about that?"_

 _"You blew up the factory but not the memories." He said softer. "Gemma... no kind of explosive you can build can get rid of those memories. Nothing can. Instead of fighting the past, you should face it head on."_

 _"Well what do you want me to do?" I cried, tears spilling from my eyes. It stung... a lot. It had been years since I cried and the flood gates just swung open. "Do you want me to remember how awful it was... what good will that do me?" I felt him put an arm over my shoulder and gingerly pulled me into his shoulder. I cried, clutching onto his jacket and cried into his shirt. I don't know how long I cried for but I do remember waking up the following morning tucked in bed._

 _That morning, I woke up totally unlike myself. The words Flynn said to me last night echoed in my head and I had no idea how to get it out. Gemma... no kind of explosive you can build can get rid of those memories. Nothing can. Instead of fighting the past, you should face it head on._

 _"Hey Gemma!" I heard Gem greet me. "You're up late this morning."_

 _"Hi Gem..." I said in a low tone. Gem looked up at her with a cocked head to the side._

 _"Are you okay?" He asked and I nodded. "Oh... okay. Listen, if you need to talk, I'm here. Or do you want me to get Dr. K?"_

 _"I'm fine." I said out loud._

 _"Right." Gem gave me a quick look before walking out of the room. I huffed before flopping back down on the bed, staring at the ceiling to collect my thoughts. The more I thought, the more I remembered my time spent at the factory. I reached out to my other gloved hand and shuddered, closing my eyes before feeling the glove on my right hand slip off then my left. I lifted my hands and gingerly opened my eyes one after the other. I did not know why I had anticipated burn marks and discoloured skin I knew was there._

 _Nevertheless, it made me nauseous._

 _I put my hands back down and clenched at the duvet. I could not pretend anymore... I could not pretend that these scars were not on my body. I could not ignore the fact that Gem almost died taking the fall for me... I could not ignore the fact that I don't know what happened to the girl in the cell next to ours after she helped us escape. I was tires of being mauled and confuses by these memories. I am a good person... it is hardly fair why all this happened to me._

 _Flynn was wrong about something though... I could destroy the memories with an explosive. I am that dynamite._

* * *

 _All the Rangers were seated downstairs at the kitchen island. I cranned my head above the crowd to see Flynn seated on the end of the table, eating breakfast and engaging in banter with Dillon... probably about cars because there is nothing else those two plus Scott can talk about. I regarded it as a macho manly thingy they had that the others – except Summer really – couldn't understand._

 _He looked up, his eyes meeting with mine before smiling widely at me before being drawn back into the conversation by Dillon. Opening my mouth to speak but Gem beats me to it, hoping to his feet and skipping over to me. "Gemma! There's this really cool technique I learned how to make detonator putty even more explosive. Ka–" He trailed off, excitedness seeping out of his tone when he saw how down I was. "Boom?" He completed in confusion. "Gemma... are you okay?"_

 _"I will be... as soon as I go somewhere." I said._

 _"Yeah, we can go right now." Gem took my hand but I drew it away like it was on fire._

 _"I... I'm sorry Gem, I really am but I can't go with you." I apologized in a low tone._

 _"Why not?" Gem asked._

 _"I just can't." I whispered. "I'm really sorry."_

 _"What is going on with you?" Gem questioned._

 _I only wrapped my arms around him in a hug. "I'm so sorry, Gem." I quietly said before pulling away quickly. Gem probably needed closure too... but I cannot push him on when he can do it. I know he will do it in his own time. He suffered more than I did; I was a reckless and cowardly and he took the blame. I cannot continue running._

 _I looked round to see all the Rangers looking at us. "Flynn... can you give me a ride?"_

 _"Are you serious, Gemma?" Gem shouted at me but I ignored him._

 _"Please Flynn..." I pleaded._

 _Flynn looked between me and Gem with an almost conflicted look on his face... which I could not tell was for what reason. "I'll go get my car keys, lass." He decided, crossing the room to get his keys but Gem stopped him, grabbing him by the shirt. "Gem... please let go." The Scot pleaded._

 _"What do you think you are doing to my sister?" Gem asked, almost teary eyed._

 _"Gem..."_

 _"Stay out of it, Gemma!" He interrupted me angrily and I jerked in surprise. Gem has never yelled at me before._

 _"Listen, Gem..."_

 _"I am not listening to you! Especially when you are taking my sister away from me!" Gem yelled at Flynn. "Tell me your angle. What do you want with my sister!"_

 _"Well, I can't really answer that now, can I?" Flynn huffed, slightly annoyed that Gem has not allowed him to truly say his mind and I discovered that he does get spicy when he is not allowed to say his opinion._

 _"And why is that?" Gem asked._

 _"It's not about you, Gem." Flynn said. "Look at her. The poor lass looks miserable, man!"_

 _"So you seem to be an expert on how my sister feels." Gem said._

 _"Like I said, this is not about you. This is about Gemma. If you really care about Gemma and she trusts me enough to help her, then you should let me." Flynn matched Gem's glare and eventually, he crumbled. He let go of Flynn and stepped aside. Flynn nodded at him before going to get his keys._

 _He handed me the keys and told me he would catch up before heading over to Gem. I hesitantly agreed and waited in the car. He came in nearly five minutes later. "Buckle your seat belt, lass." He instructed me._

 _"What... did you two talk about?" I asked quietly._

 _"Just making sure he was okay." He smiled at me. "Now, how about you tell me where we're heading off to, lass?"_

 _"Can we head to the grocery store first?" I asked. "We have a long day ahead of us."_

 _"Is this about yesterday?" He asked as he turned the ignition and the truck roared to life._

 _"Yeah... I've stopped running." I said._

* * *

 _Hours later after our stop at the grocery store where I bought two lunch meals, green manure and a jar of sawdust and grass clippings from the hardware store – which Flynn questioned in utter annoyance because I was using his debit card – he drove me out of Corinth and out to the wastelands towards the factory. The debris was still there but the sight was still slightly daunting._

 _Taking a deep breath, I took the jar and stepped out of the car. I stepped towards the fallen debris along its edges. Bravely, I pulled off my gloves and put them in my pocket, exposing my marred skin even though I knew Flynn was right behind me. Either way, I ignored him. "Missed me?" I grinned at the debris as I spoke even though my tone was side amd my eyes were shining with tears. "I'm not so fond of you though. When I was captured by Alphabet Soup, I thought I'd never see the outside again – or at all since I have no memory of what the world looked like before._

 _"So when Alphabet Soup collapsed after you were released into the world, I was ecstatic that I could do a total bust out mission with my brother to kick your tin can butt to February 31st. But we didn't expect you to be that brutal. When we left the base, the air was so thick with tar and monoxide that I could hardly breath but still Gem amd I soldiered on. We destroyed a lot of your bases and I am very proud we posed a threat to you... and you didn't like us for it so you captured us._

 _"You showed us just how heartless you are. No one can blame you, you're just a machine. You maybe self aware but you can't feel. You are just programming, nuts and bolts. I don't even think that you know why you conquered the world. I don't even think you know just how much pain you caused the humans you captured." I lifted my hands. "You see these hands? One of your Venjix bots burned them in acid after I carelessly tried to sabotage one of the machines. I can't even imagine what you did to Gem after he took the fall for me._

 _"To the torture and the long hours I spent sweating, bleeding and crying in that factory, I thank you. Like I said, you're just a machine. You will never understand human emotion. So thank you. You created a childish, explosion obsessed, crayon addicted monster. And I am glad because you have given me the courage and the strength to go on. I could've died... I would've died but thanks to you, even if I die, it won't be in vain. The creator is above the creation. We made you. And we can destroy you." I smiled as I wiped at my eyes before grabbing the jar of grass clippings. "And when we do win... I'd rather not let this ugly, grotesque thing that was once a building that symbolised pain and tears remain." I opened and spread it across the ground "I don't know a thing about about agriculture and I probably have a dead thumb but if one flower blooms here I am going to be happy and frolick around here like it's a meadow."_

 _Dusting my hands, I stood up and cleaned my dirtied knees. "Are you okay, lass?"_

 _"I'm... better than before." I grinned. "Let's play hop scotch."_

 _Flynn looked dazed. "What?"_

 _"You heard me." I set off to find a stick – which wasn't hard to find before drawing in the sand; four rows and four columms. "This is a two people set up."_

 _"I thought hop scotch was for one person." Flynn scratched his head._

 _"Gem and I created it to accomodate two people because we loved playing together." I said. "Please play with me."_

 _"Gemma... it's a long drive back to Corinth." I pouted at his response and there came that conflicted look again. "The things I do for you." He muttered under his breath amd I cheered, hopping around like a kangaroo that just ate Mr. Marshmellow. "How do you play this thing then?"_

 _"Okay so I take one opposite end and you take the other." I said. "So we jump in at the same time on the first two boxes on the left..." I explained the game and he begrudgingly listened before we attempted to do it._

 _Flynn is so clumsy on his feet, I almost died laughing._

 _He kept stepping on lines and missing hopping beats. "Flynn, you are such a stiffy."_

 _"Are you calling me stiff?" I gave him a sardonic look and nodded. "You're calling a man who has had to master every highland and Ceilidh traditional dances stiff?"_

 _"What are those?" I questioned._

 _He looked conflicted before giving in. "Okay but don't be a wee clipe. You tell on me and I will bury your toolbox in these ruins." I gasped in horror and mortification, clutching at my chest before begrudgingly agreeing. Satisfied with my answer, he sighed with a hint of embarrassment on his face before standing on his tip toes and jumping around in precision with twirls, kicks and leaps that looked awesome and fun but he stopped as quickly as he started and I was saddened by this._

 _"No! Why did you stop?" I protested._

 _"Because I haven't done it in ages so my ankles will give out." He explained._

 _"What was that?" I asked, marveling at him and how he had proved me wrong in such a cool way._

 _"The Highlands Sword Dance."_

 _"Can you teach me?" I asked._

 _He laughed. "Lass, traditional dances aren't for the weak bodied. And even if you are good for it, I'm pretty sure I am a God awful teacher."_

 _"Well you did try to teach me pool." I laughed and he glared at me but I did not waver. He was too adorable to take seriously. "Then where did you learn them?" I asked, changing the subject._

 _"School; eleven years of torture." He scoffed._

 _"You schooled in Scotland?" I asked._

 _"In the highlands to be exact. The schooling system in Scotland aims at preserving our culture and heritage but the highland schools were no child's play when it came to this. Dancing everyday after school for an hour or until your ankles would give out... whichever came first, really. And we had to speak in Gaelic outside of classes and when I first arrived there, I didn't know any other language except English. I always used to get a spanking for it or teased by the other kids." He laughed as he looked off into the distance. "I was raised by my nan and aunt during my school days and by my dad during the holidays. Nan lived up in Fort William and was a very strict one. I used to live on her dairy farm; I'd milk the cows every morning before I'd go to school and school was an hour walk away. It was pretty fun though growing up around those parts. Everyone knew everyone and there was always some fun affair going on. I guess what made it sort of unbearable was how people perceived me. I was a city boy who had a passion for helping the people, some of the townsfolk never took me seriously or even thought I was a nuisance because I didn't really understand their struggles."_

 _"That's not nice..." I trailed off in annoyance. Flynn was the most resourceful person I know. All he wanted to do was help and out of the goodness of his heart just like he always does. It is who he is._

 _"I could understand why they felt that way." He sighed. "My dad was a successful mechanic who owned shops down in Edinburgh and Glasgow. I had never struggled with anything the way they did. There was always money, food, clothes and other living essentials for us to live on. I had been on a plane more times than I can count and some of my classmate had never even been on a private car let alone a bus. After we finished high school, I went to university down in Coventry in England. Most of them couldn't even go to a local university in the lowlands of Scotland. I was blessed... I still am blessed even if this world has been wiped out for the most part; others didn't survive Venjix. So I understand why people can't trust me. They always wonder what's in it for me because I had a lot of things they didn't."_

 _"You don't say everything..." I noticed out loud._

 _"Yes because the only thing most of them had that I didn't was a mother." He admitted._

 _"Where is she?" I dared to ask._

 _"She abandoned me and my dad and disappeared without a trace."_

 _"Oh..." I murmured as silence fell over us. I honestly had no idea what to say to that. "I don't even know if I had parents."_

 _Flynn nodded. "Yeah... Kinda makes me feel stupid for even saying that in the first place." I was surprised at his choice of words and was about to question it but he continued to speak. "Either way, I was blessed to have a father and a nan who love and care about me. You only had Gem. You have nowhere you can call home, you have suffered for being completely innocent in this world."_

 _"You don't know that..." I sighed sadly._

 _"Yes I do, Gemma." He protested before gently taking my hands in his. There was more of an effect on me than it had last time when he held my hand but I had my gloves on so it was understandable. Now I was self conscious about him looking at my hands. I tried to pull them away but he stopped me. "Gemma, I know you are uncomfortable but you don't have to be."_

 _"It looks atrocious." I said, downcast as I looked at the ground. I was surprised when he lifted my hands to his lips and pressed them against the discolored skin. My heart began to race and I could barely register how my breath got clogged in my throat. How can I even process my thoughts and feelings... Are feelings like this even plausible?_

 _"They are a part of you so they are beautiful just the way you are." He told me. "You are intelligent, strong and full of life. Don't ever think less of yourself, lass."_

 _"You think I'm beautiful?" I asked._

 _"You ask that as if it is not true." Evasive answer. I frowned as I stared at him, completely confused at what he means. "You must be hungry, lass. We should..." I stopped him before he could go off. "Gemma? Is something wrong?"_

 _"What are you doing to me?" I asked him, resting my forehead against his shoulder._

 _"Gemma..."_

 _Summer said I like you but I... I don't know. I think I do. You just make me... confused. I don't understand." I huffed before pulling away. "I don't know what to think anymore. I've never been in a situation like this or at least I don't remember being in a situation like this and I have been thinking so much about–" I was cut off by Flynn who had dipped down and pressed his lips against mine._

 _I stood there utterly frozen; eyes wide open, my heart racing, my face hot and my head getting dizzy. I had no idea what to do and I only realized just how unresponsive I was after Flynn started to grow hesitant. Fearing he would pull away, I held his cheeks in my hands and responded albeit I had no idea what I was doing. Kissing was in an entirely new ball park for me but it left me with this light feeling in my chest._

 _He pulled away suddenly, too quickly for my liking and I let out a small whiny sound. "I... I should stop while I can." His voice was low and deep._

 _"Why?" I asked in confusion. "You didn't like it?"_

 _"No, no I did. It was just... I think I like it more than I should." Flynn stepped back, scratching his head. "I don't want to make you... uncomfortable by going too fast."_

 _"I... don't understand." I blushed._

 _"Gemma," He called my attention. "I am crazy about you, lass... and it is more than I have ever felt for anyone and that scares me. But right now is not exactly the right space for us to have a relationship."_

 _"But isn't that... what two people do when they like each other?" I asked._

 _"You said it yourself that you think that you like me." Flynn said. "We should really understand what we want first." I understood what he was saying and I agreed. I really needed to understand how I felt so we agreed to stay friends for the meantime. There was so much I didn't understand even about myself._

 _And when I did... I felt like my world was going to fall apart._

* * *

A _week after that, Gem and I were making explosives for an upcoming mission. Our relationship was less strained than before. The fact that I was hanging out less with Flynn made him more comfortable. We haven't spoken a word of what happened between Flynn and I. As far as Gem was concerned, I just wanted get some closure from the factory._

 _"Can you pass me the green LED?" I asked._

 _Gem nodded before standing from a seat at the kitchen island where we were working and heading for a plastic bag with all their parts in it._ _"I don't know where–"_

 _"You put it." I completed. "Check the blue bag–"_

 _"Under the counter?" I nodded at him and he bent down to pick up the bag but something happened. As Gem hunched over for the bag, he froze and clutched at his chest, coughing and wheezing violently as his eyes widened in shock._

 _"Gem!" I screamed, drawing attention from everyone as Gem fell over, completely unconscious. I jumped to my feet and scrambled over to him. I took him in my arms and began to shake him. "Wake up... wake up... Wake up! Gem! Wake up!" I chanted this over and over again as my brain pounded rapidly against my skull, images that were floating in the depths of my mind – a gray area I could not access – hit me like a ton of bricks as memories that were once upon a time so far to reach tumbled over me._

 _I looked down at Gem and saw blackened cheeks using the light provided by the huge, house sized bonfire before us – our childhood home, the only home we ever knew. "Gem..." I huffed, holding his wrist to check his pulse. He was limp but still alive. It was then a thought struck me. **Mom... dad... abuela... abuelita...** it's all my fault. "Damnit... damnit!" I screamed._

 _Two figures stood before me, wearing their tuxedoes. I hated them so much. "Now will you cooperate... Gemma Fei-Lu?"_ _I was brought back to the present after Dillon and Scott carried Gem out of the room and into Dr. K's lab. Everything looked different... felt different. The many bright colours that once upon a time surrounded my life began to dull. My thoughts sounded different... and it scared me. I helplessly watched from the floor where I was seated before diverting my attention to the floor._

 _My memories were back... and I didn't want them_ _._

 _Take them back...Take them back..._

 _"It's worse than I thought." I heard Dr. K say after an hour of silence._

 _"What is?" Summer's voice was next to make itself known to me._

 _"When Gem and Gemma first arrived, I found some signs of inflammation in their lungs and I thought I had treated it. But it seems like Gem had a more severe case."_

 _"Doc, can you please get straight to the point?" Scott pleaded._

 _"Well... Gem has asbestosis and it is already at a very critical stage."_

 _I sucked a breath at the response and my head started to pound. I held my head in my hands as it throbbed. The memories were too much... I can't stand them._ _"Gemma..." I heard Summer say, crouched down in front of me._

 _"Get away..." I gasped._

 _"Gemma. It's okay, Gemm–"_

 _"Get the hell away from me!" I shoved her away and stood to my feet before stomping off to the other side of the room, holding my head. It was all a lie... everything was a lie. I looked up as everyone looked at me bewildered. "What are you guys looking at?" I huffed angrily, wondering where this outburst came from. "Focus on your own shit instead of me." I turned my heel and stormed out of the garage._

 _The real me was resurfacing... and it scared the hell out of me._

* * *

 _I found myself at the beach, staring out at waves. It was something I've never done before... at least post Alphabet Soup. The beach was meant for childish fun like building sandcastles, splashing around and burying people in the sand. Staring at the waves was boring but seeing how it calmed me, I was not so sure anymore._

 _I'm an ass in real life. Not in this blissful cloud I put myself in. Gem has not changed much now that I think about it. He has always been a cinammon roll. I would not say we were polar opposites but... I'm just not a good person in general._

 _I was the one who caused Alphabet Soup to get us. I met the recruiters at a UNESCO summit when they were in Alberquerque. Gem had been chosen for a Technicrane junior Robotics programme and I was not. I was pissed honestly. I always prided myself in being the better twin; more independent, smarter, stronger, faster, more athletic. What made it unbearable was the fact that I had to put effort in everything to be better than him and with him... it was all natural. Worst of all; he didn't care so he basically used to show me up in a one-side sibling rivalry all on my end. Unlike now when we do almost everything together... I could not stand the idea working with him so I practically never did._

 _Gem was the sociable one while I am a stuck up tramp. He fit into everything so easily and can go with the flow easily. Hell, when we went to visit my mom's side of the family in Puerto Rico, he fit in so easily with the local kids while I stuck out like a sore Asian thumb. And worst part; I could never hate Gem. He was too sweet and sociable and funny and kind. Sometimes he annoyed the crap out of me but at others... I thought he was too precious for this world._

 _When I went with my dad and abuelita to a UNESCO summit while Gem was in the junior programme, the recruiters of Alphabet Soup were there showing off plans for a Think Green Robot prototype and I was so engrossed in the plan that I was just throwing ideas at them. They were impressed that I understood such complex robotics at sixteen and offered me mentorship. I was willing to prove myself so I joined._

 _I used to create schematics, design new tech and do coding. It was pretty harmless at first until I started being sent orders to make some pretty advanced and dangerous military equipment. Because overprotective older twin's Spidey senses were tingling after he saw one of my assignments, he reported to my parents who agreed that I should stop designing tech for Alphabet Soup and they literally forbade me. Being stubborn, I continued until I realized it was too late._

 _One of the weapons I designed was televised in the news brutalling killing hundreds of people down in Iraq by American troops. I may have been an ass but my intentions were to never hurt people. I saw science as a beautiful medium to make the world better... not as a medium for war and hatred to be born. So I stopped and tried to disassociate with Alphabet Soup. I had worked under them for almost a year and they threatened me, saying I knew their military secrets and the insides of the think tank. I never took them serious... until my mom, dad and grandparents died in a fire they started using one of my old weapons._

 _But they saved Gem because it was all a part of their plan. That's when they took us. I was so naïve and stupid back then, it annoyed me so that I think about it now. I am a fake... I have always been a fake._

 _I heard the distinct sound of two cars approaching through the sand and pull up a safe distance away. I heard car doors open and several footsteps approach. "It's funny how... everything has changed. The world looks duller than ever. Nothing makes sense anymore yet everything makes sense." I turned to look at the Rangers. "I got my memories back..." I said. "But it's not all rainbows and unicorns."_

 _"Gemma... what are you–" I_ _cut Dillon short and told them all they needed to know. I did not expect any of them to understand._

 _"... You know, I used to be a spoilt brat growing up." I heard Summer say. "I could never differentiate my real friends from fakes and because of it, I ended up losing the only person whoever cared about me. I look in the mirror today and I am nowhere near the person I was yesterday."_

 _I furrowed my eyebrows before turning back to the gang. "What do you mean?"_

 _"You regaining your memories doesn't mean you aren't the you you are today." Summer said with a sisterly smile. "In a matter of fact, it should just motivate you to be a better person. To keep on being the person you are now."_

 _I sighed. "Impossible. The new me is too... whacky and eccentric. She lives inside this cloud where everything is beautiful and alright and I... I want to believe her but I can't. There's too much guilt, too much evil. The person who deserves to live that kind of life is Gem but now he is sick and it is all my fault."_

 _"What do you mean, lass?" It was the first time Flynn had spoken this entire time and I stiffened visibly. If he knew... would he think any differently of me? Is he creeped out but this side of me that has been hidden inside of me?_

 _"I'm not the person you think I am." I sighed sadly._

 _"Then who are you really?" He demanded. "We're your friends and we care about you. You just can't keep us in the dark forever."_

 _"... When we got to the Venjix factory, I was desperate to get out. I couldn't function like Gem could. I couldn't adapt like Gem could. I was just... there suffering from the grueling agony. I had planned on escaping and Gem tried to talk me out of it but I flat out refused and told him I'm leaving him behind if he doesn't co-operate._

 _"I failed and that's when they burned my hands in acid as punishment but midway through, Gem said he was the one who planned the escape. He was beaten to an inch of his life and sent to work in the asbestos mine for a year until I rescued him and escaped once and for all. He could have died... or worse all because I'm a jack ass who lives and breathes to prove a point and finally get out of the shadow of Gem." I admitted as I felt air leave my body._

 _I was so raw and open right now, I felt like I was vulnerable to any form of attack. My own motives were finally clear... all I wanted was to be away from Gem and I never had a clear reason why. Before, I just thought it was so that I could have space to breathe and interact with others without interference. Now that I remember everything, it was because I could never handle appearing inferior. I never realized it then but me wanting to escape without his help would be the ultimate test of who is the better twin yet he still one upped me and took the fall for my stupidity._

 _And through all this, I realized that I never appreciated Gem enough. Even when I am being petty in trying to best him, he still cheers me on, when my rashness and stupidity become my downfall, he picks me up and dusts me off without saying I told you so, even if I am adamant that I do not need him, he follows me anyway and protects me and everytime I royally messed up, he would take the fall for it. He even wore identical gloves to mine so that I wouldn't feel like a lonely abomination._

 _It was not Dr. K or Summer or even Flynn who firstly realized that I was an individual on my own... it was Gem. That is why he put in so much time to put up with my crap, because he always believed in my capabilities. Him being clingy and overprotective was just him doing his big brother job._

 _"Gem truly is a gem..." I blurted out loud. "The world doesn't deserve him... I don't deserve him."_

 _"That's what I thought about my brother, Marcus." Scott said as he walked over to me. "He was the real hero. I was just an asshat."_

 _"You still are." Dillon chipped in but Summer slapped him upside the head to reprimand him._

 _"Thanks." Scott nodded in appreciation before turning back to me. "Gemma, it is so easy to fall into the trap of thinking that you need to be better than your sibling just to prove yourself. It was for me especially since my dad is my commanding officer. Marcus was everything I was not and even though I loved him, it pissed me off. Marcus still thought I was worthy to be up in the air with him regardless of how much of an asshat I am or how much my dad said no. I never properly appreciated him for it... and I regret it now that he is gone."_

 _I bowed my head and averted my gaze from his. "Gemma, you are many things... crazy, childish, quirky and just plain weird but just like me, you are misguided and the fact that you realized your own mistakes says a lot. If only everyone else had a big brother to know just how awesome it is to have someone stand by our side no matter what. And as long as he is alive, appreciate all that he does for you. And once you finally put all the self doubt behind you, it is easier to grow and change."_

 _... Saying that I could relate to Scott Truman was a real surprise but in actual fact, he just gave me the pieces to move forward. I started to appreciate Gem, his flaws and his caring nature for me more and more and started acting more like a sister – even more than after we joined Alphabet Soup. I told him I regained my memories but I insisted on not sharing them with him. It would be better for him if he remembered on his own than me blurting it all out to him._

 _Besides, ignorance is a bliss._

 _After the final battle, Gem and I both joined as flyers in the Eagle Squad. Even after regaining my memories, blowing stuff up, being crazy and carefree was still a lot of fun but I did manage to be level headed and mature at times. Gem's health flactuates a lot so I make sure he gets good medical attention. Right now, he is currently in hospital and has been for a month now. His doctor said it is not looking good but Gem is not one to give up without a fight. I kind of get emotional thinking about it because he is my twin and I love him to pieces. He is part of the three most important men in my life._

 _And speaking of important men, Flynn and I had our first son together three years ago; Ethan Conrad McAlister the second because Flynn's dad insisted we name him after his granddad. It was an argument that took three hours when they were filling out the birth certificate – no one even listened to Gem's opinion for the baby to be named after his favorite uncle. We never really got married because my job has me in different places all the time so Ethan was basically a... mistake– a dearly loved mistake I would not change for the world to be quite frank._ _How Flynn and I got together on the other hand is an even funnier story that involved a whole lot of jealousy when I started developing a tight knit friendship with Scott. Again, a strange concept but we did understand each other on a deep level and we got along great much to Flynn's dismay._

 _Our relationship together as partners and co-parents has not been easy in the slightest. We had to iron out so many trust issues and personal problems. We argued on a daily basis to the extent where we both wondered whether it was worth it until we both eventually took a step back to assess what the problem was and iron it out. The ethics of love and attraction are still murky but I am not clueless and bashful like I was in the past. I have never been with another person to fully experience what it is but venturing into it with Flynn is more than enough._

* * *

"I really wish you could stop trailing off like that." Flynn muttered when Gemma finally came back into it, snapping out of her trance. "Gosh, sometimes talking to you is like talking to a tortoise."

Gemma frowned at him. "Really? You know what? I think we chatted enough. I think Scott wants to debrief me for our next mission so I should get going."

Flynn darkened visibly. "He gets to see you for twenty four hours, every single day of the week. So sit still, this is my time to have your attention."

Gemma smirked. "Calm down. You know afros are not my type." Flynn glared at her. "You are very hot when you are jealous."

"You think I am now, just wait until you get home." He wiggled his eyebrows at Gemma who began to blush in embarrasment as the idea floated in her mind. "I have a customer, I'll talk to you soon." Gemma bid him a goodbye before turning off the feed. She immediately felt empty like she normally did after talking to him like she did when she blew buildings up.

This was not her life anymore.

She used to think that Gem's absence caused this and indeed it did. In her attempts to be the great sister she never was, she forgot that she wasn't just a sister anymore. She had a family now; a loving boyfriend and an incredible son – one who was practically growing up without a mother. It was moments like this when she wondered if this was worth it still. The only person who truly made this enjoyable would and could be out sick for months. Even so, it was still not clicking.

Despite Gem being her brother; a significantly huge part of her life, she has a life of her own now. This is in no way similar to the way she used to push him away back when it was just the two of them. Before, they were all each other had. Now Gemma has new commitments.

"I've been looking for you." Scott said, making his presence known as he walked in, pulling Gemma out of her reverie. "Was that Flynn?"

"Being his regular, Scottish self." Gemma shrugged.

"I hope everything's okay with him, mini him and male you." Scott said.

"You are so mean." Gemma huffed, folding her arms over her chest. "When will you get your own lady friend?"

"The robot apocalypse wiped out the earth along with all my chances of leaving bachelor paradise." Scott grinned arrogantly.

The Silver RPM ranger laughed. "Mark my words, someday you will be whipped and I will be laughing my butt off when you do."

* * *

 **Author's note: Wow, that was a lot to write! I decided not to flesh out the romance between Gemma and Flynn because the chapter would become far too long... besides, Flynn will have his own chapter so it makes sense to not write about it here to avoid redundancy when it shows up again. There was the option of dividing each character's back story into chapters but that would cause issues in uniformity in these cases:**

 **Some characters' pasts were already shown in the show and don't really need to be fleshed out again. For example, writing about Z's past from PR SPD will be shorter than writing about say Riley's from PRDC because Z's past was already given flesh in the show. Another aspect would be character complexity. Because Gemma is such a complex character as compared to... Dax for instance, her chapters would probably be more than Dax's if I divided them into chapters. In order to avoid long stories in terms of chapters (Say 200+ even though there are 103 rangers) it is easier to make it one shots and select what I want the story to cover based on one theme.**

 **This will be updated in moderation because honestly... it does take up time. I just use this to keep the creative juices flowing. And the characters I write about are totally at random. I'** **d appreciate your thoughts on this as everyone may have a different way of interpreting the past of a character.**

 **Thanks for reading  
BlazeWinger**


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